I recently watched a television show featuring Grammy nominated singer, Michael Buble'. He is an extremely talented artist, no doubt, and, during an interview, he shared something that really caught my attention.
He
said that, around the age of 5 or 6 years old, he told his parents
unequivocally that he knew who he was and what he wanted to be when he
grew up. He was a singer and, someday, he'd be famous for it. I can
imagine his parents, who were not famous or close to celebrity circles,
as they smiled and patted his head. Michael said they were a little
freaked out by his assertion, but he never doubted what he'd told them.
(His father was a commercial fisherman and didn't really believe his
son could make a living at something that didn't involve using your
hands.)
But... Wow! What a statement! I've known people
who've said they have always known what they wanted to do with their
lives. And they've done it, with a single minded vision, direction and
purpose.
Not everyone has been blessed with such sustained insight about themselves. There are many people who live their lives "in quiet desperation" for the lost part of themselves that was once a dream of what they would accomplish in their life and how they would be fulfilled and happy.
I'm not a psychiatrist or counselor, but I firmly believe that everyone knows exactly who they are and what they want. I think they, for whatever reason, have given in to the external forces that are always playing the devil's advocate for why it won't work, why you can't do it, and why it's best to just go with the flow and not rock the boat.
Cliches aside, let that sink in: I believe you DO know what you really
want. But getting it and living your dream may call for drastic
changes in your current lifestyle, and that may be something you are
not willing to do. Making those trade-offs can be painful or scary.
How can you know what you really want? I have a few tips for you that might help.
1. Think about what you wanted to do when you were a child. Did you dream of being an astronaut or a movie star? What drew you to want those things? You may have had an irrepressible - at that time - talent for science or the arts. We are born with inherent talents and dispositions. As children, those talents are unhampered, for the most part, and can be key insights to your passion and purpose that can be sustained for the rest of your life. If you were a child that went from one thing to another, then, think about all of those things and find a common thread. You may be shocked at what you discover (or remember!) about yourself. Another step along these lines that you can do is ask your parents, if you are able, "When I was a kid, what did you think I would grow up to be?" Sometimes, your parents developed perceptions about your talents as well and can get you thinking again your young aspirations.
2. Think about your life now and what you do and think about in your free time.
Are you still fascinated about the mysteries of the universe? Do you
go to movies, talk about them, critique them, imagine yourself on
stage? What do you daydream about? We can be so caught up in the
"box" we've created for ourselves with everyday routine that we don't
realize our dreams are NOT lost; they are with us every day, guiding us
to be all that we were born to be without exception. We just may not
be listening. And THAT can lead to those feelings of something just
not being quite right in our lives.
3. Next, get a journal,
and, for the next 30 days, every day, write down what you did and what
you thought about in your free moments away from the day's
responsibility activities. What were you thinking about in those
moments when you slipped away from awareness of things around you and
had to snap back to attention because the phone rang or a co-worker
said, "Hey! What are you thinking about?"
One thing you may discover is that the career or life path you've chosen is exactly in line with your dreams.
You may just have to uncover what it is that you've left out of the
equation that creates the fulfillment you crave. Just mending that
breach may change your life - without changing your life at all.
If
you do discover what it is you really want, I challenge you to take the
next steps to creating a plan to outline now what you need to do to get
it... And have a great time doing it!
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